Sunday, July 12, 2009

The End Is the Beginning

Life is about decisions. Or is it? Recently I read that making a decision is just the start of the path that decision takes you on. This is particularly fascinating to me, as I am someone who has always belabored decisions. Am I making the right one? Where will it lead? Always trying to make sure my decision is a good, informed one. And once it is made, I am done.

Not so. Making the decision is only the beginning, not the end. I understand this more clearly than I ever have (if I ever have). No matter how we try to make the "right" decision, the path that it leads us down is entirely unpredictable.

For a simplistic example, take our recent refrigerator purchase. We looked at different brands, debated what would work best, and ended up with a new refrigerator. All done. Not really. What if it is a lemon, what if it leaks some odd gas that makes me deranged, what if....

The reality is I don't know. My decision to purchase a refrigerator could result in a multitude of things. Did the actual decision matter that much? No. Whatever I purchased or if I made no purchase would of probably worked out fine though the path with the different refrigerators MAY be different.

So I am starting to think that belaboring decisions may as likely to lead to disappointment as success. In feeling we made the best decision, we try to force the results we want that decision to come up in. We can't. And so we feel we failed.

The journey caused by each decision will continue until the next decision needs to be made. That decision may come very quickly on the heels of the last one, such as "that decision didn't work out, perhaps something else will be better".

What is all this rambling mean for me? I am going to start moving forward with my life by listening to my heart. I will make a decision based on what I feel is the right thing for me, and then leave it behind so I can experience the journey it leads me on. No more belaboring, just living at each moment. The decision is not the end but only the beginning to a journey of unknown results. There is no wrong decision if we allow ourselves to live and learn about life from these results and not let them make us sad.

1 comment:

bigandpaul said...

Interesting thoughts Papa. But doesn't all that belaboring, thinking through many of the possible paths that decision might take, ultimately lead to the best decision? Sure it's tough to choose something, but I don't think that always going purely on a gut instinct, even if any choice could potentially be good, is the best approach. When I think, even on the stupidest of things like buying chocolate or potato chips, I feel satisfied when I know I chose the right one for my mood. I understand that you can learn from your mistakes and that it's important to not waste time and energy on sometimes menial things, but I think if you always go on a gut instinct you kind of limit yourself in the options presented to you. Yes, you can be happy with whatever, but if you immediately choose Doritos every time because you've learned from your previous experience that Doritos are tasty and satisfying, you're missing out on Baked Lays, Cheetohs, and all the other delicious chips available. Maybe not the best example, but you could relate it to a lot of things. Even today, my last day in Prague, I was looking at all the different things to do here and how I haven't done a lot of them. I'm happy with how I've spent my time, but the fact that I didn't think about things so much means that I won't be able to see these things until I come back to Prague, which could be quite some time. Once again, I'm happy, but I think that by doing a little thinking about what I could do, rather than just making decisions based on my instinct, I could have seen and done a lot more that would only have added to my experience here. Hrmmmm well I don't know if I'm making any sense, but I thought I'd contribute something.

I love you and I'll talk to you soon. Weeeeee! Spain!!!!!

paul