Balancing and Falling

Recently I read a book by Richard Rohr called "Falling Upward". It talked about moving to the second half of life. At this time in my life, I feel that I am moving into that second half as he describes it. This is becoming more and more apparent to me as I struggle with the feeling of unease I have in my job.

At this point, I am thankful for my job and I don't have the feeling I had years ago of needing to get out now. But I now realize that I am balancing myself between how I view life and how life needs to be viewed when working for a corporation.

Our whole first half of life is balance. Work/family/self all needs to be allocated a proper amount of time. We often hear of work/life balance in our jobs. We hear about the need to have "me" time, to exercise. spend time with kids etc. We balance between all these demands to create our life and raise our families.

But for me, the balance is very unstable. Like walking a tight rope outside in a strong wind. Back and forth, trying to stay on the rope. I think now I view the second half of life as falling off that rope, getting my feet on the ground, and not balancing life between the shoulds.

Maybe it's not even being on the ground. Maybe it is bouncing in the net, reveling in the freedom of not needing to balance. Maybe it is looking up at the sky and breathing freely, not worrying about falling off the tightrope because I am already off it.

It is my time now, to live and create life in the way I desire. No need to be awkward trying to balance but just enjoying the feeling of the fact that now that I am off the wire I can look at life without the worry of the fall.